Ah, the 80s and 90s: a golden era of mixtapes, slap bracelets, and the ever-lurking threat of nuclear war. Back when your biggest dilemma was whether to sit outside all day playing Kick the Can or be glued to the TV blasting the pixelated glory of the original Nintendo. Let’s take a stroll down memory lane, shall we? Spoiler alert: it’s mostly covered in VHS tape.
In a time when “googling” meant looking something up in a dictionary, we navigated the world with the guide of friendship bracelets and a healthy collection of Lisa Frank stickers. Remember trying to score an invite to a party because someone's mom had a stash of Pop Rocks? Ah, the sweet* taste of social success! Meanwhile, today’s kids are exchanging TikTok handles faster than we could recite the lyrics to "Baby Got Back." And honestly, I don't know what’s worse: the fact that “influencers” now dictate trends or that they probably don’t even know who Billy Zabka is. Cue slow, dramatic exhale.
Let’s talk about fashion. Dudes rocking mullets and acid wash jeans were the epitome of cool, yet here we are, tragically watching the rise of *infinity scarves* paired with questionable leggings. What has the world come to when high-waisted mom jeans are considered revolutionary? Back in our day, we had one rule about denim: the more distressed, the better—preferably with enough fraying to imply that the wearer had a close encounter with a rabid squirrel. And can we talk about lunch? You haven’t truly lived until you’ve devoured a Lunchable while hanging on the monkey bars, not swiping on some esoteric food-ordering app.
So, as we pack our fanny packs for a weekend trip down memory lane—possibly to a blockbuster so we can reminisce about late fees—let’s raise a white claw to nostalgia and complain about how kids today don’t know what real struggle is. Remember pulling those long, awkward cords on a landline phone, praying for it to reach into another room while expertly dodging your parents' complaints about your mixtape habit? Ah, sweet, sweet irony!
But ultimately, Gen-X, let’s embrace our unique fate as the forgotten middle child of generational priorities. As we roll our eyes at the avocado toast brigade, let’s crank up some grunge and reminisce about the days when “homework” didn’t mean Googling for answers and when the greatest *iPhone* battle was deciphering which side of the cassette tape was really the “A” side. What a time to be alive!