Ah, the 1980s and 1990s — a time when our biggest worries included whether we had enough quarters to rent "The Breakfast Club" for the weekend or if that cute kid in homeroom would ever notice our acid-washed jeans. Back then, life was like a poorly mastered mixtape: scratchy, filled with a few happy accidents (like that one time I mistook a dare for a good idea and ended up climbing the treehouse), and you actually had to put in some effort to get to the good parts. Now, thanks to technology, kids today have it so easy! Just ask Siri, who is somehow way more knowledgeable than any of our squirrelly classmates who were so convinced they could recite the entire "Fresh Prince" theme song.
These days, every meal comes with a side of Instagram. Back in our day, meals came with a side of **SpaghettiOs**, which actually tasted like spaghetti but had the bonus of being absolutely impossible to spell. If we wanted to impress someone, we didn’t post a filter-laden picture of our food; we threw caution to the wind and, with our boldest mullet, challenged them to a game of "Duck Hunt" for the grand prize of bragging rights. Back when a trip to the mall meant debating the merits of JTT (Jonathan Taylor Thomas, for the uninitiated) versus Leo DiCaprio and whether Aqua Net could actually defy the laws of physics. Spoiler alert: It did, at least until you stepped outside.
Now, nostalgia is the new currency of the internet. Everyone seems to be cashing in on T-shirt lines featuring the "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles" and fuzzy memories of where you were when Kurt Cobain's cardigan hit the floor. Sure, we get it; you miss dial-up modems and the sweet, sweet sound of 56k connection error tones. But will you still be humming "I Want It That Way" when you're sitting in a self-driving car, helplessly swiping through TikTok videos of kids asking Alexa how to tie their shoes? It’s almost too painful to imagine, like that time you walked into a Blockbuster only to find out it was a mattress store now.
Sure, our memories are a bit foggy (or maybe that's just all that hairspray clouding our judgment), but let's cherish those days when weekends meant sleepovers with "The Goonies" on repeat and the highlight of our social calendar was strategically arranging our Beanie Babies. Let’s not forget that there was something magical about pressing “record” on the VCR, hoping your mom didn’t come in and ruin your entire “Hocus Pocus” marathon. So, here's to the past! May our flip phones remain forever in a drawer, collecting dust, and our spirits never fully succumb to this thing called “adulting.” Cheers to all of you who still have a little cassette tape in your soul!