Ah, the 80s and 90s—an era when the most pressing question on your mind wasn’t what filter to use on your selfies, but whether you could convince your parents to let you stay up past 9 PM to watch “Full House.” Remember flipping through the channels on your tube TV, landing on MTV, and actually seeing… music videos? Yeah, it’s hard to believe that once upon a time, the network was not a glorified reality show habit tracker. Back then, we made music video marathons great again, and our hair was big enough to compete with the skyline of New York City.
Who doesn’t fondly recall the moment they watched the premiere of “Thriller” on their tiny, pixelated screen? It was like a mini-culture shock delivered right to your living room, as your mom sipped her Tab, completely oblivious to how her 8-year-old was learning the moonwalk—disrupting family parties and accidentally knocking over the VHS player while performing. Oh, those were the days, when we only had to choose between dial-up connections and the jarring sound of AOL connecting… and the rest of the family screaming at you to hang up so they could use the phone.
And let’s not even talk about the fashion choices that defined our youth. It was a glorious, mismatched smorgasbord of acid-washed jeans, flannel shirts, and more neon than a highlighter factory explosion. We wore more scrunchies than we could count, while our parents insisted that when we grew up, we’d find it inexplicable. Spoiler alert: they were right. But years of vivid memories were spent sweating under our very own personal heatwave while jamming to mini-cassette tapes, convinced that “Weird Al” Yankovic was the pinnacle of musical artistry.
Now, I gaze upon today’s youth, scrolling through TikTok like they’re dodging the draft, dancing as if through an earthquake. In my heart, I chuckle—yeah, “TikTok dances” are just what we called “being young, uncoordinated, and desperate for attention” in the 90s. The sassiness was just bottled up until someone invented the internet. Until then, we showed our true selves by screaming lyrics we half-remembered into hairbrush microphones. “I Want it That Way”? Sweet nostalgia, but we were living it and crafting elaborate mixtapes to woo our crushes. Today’s kids don’t know this weirdly benevolent and sadistic rite of passage—trying to record your favorite song off the radio without a DJ ruining the whole vibe.
So let’s raise a glass of Hi-C to the past. Let’s embrace the chaos, the aesthetics of slouch socks worn with our coolest pair of patent leather Mary Janes, and the endless search for the last bag of Fun Dip at the local gas station. We conquered the playground, we survived the fashion, and most importantly, we reigned supreme as the generation that taught the world how to party as if no one was watching—because maybe they weren’t, and that? That’s a triumph to remember as we update our profiles with nostalgia-fueled irony every Throwback Thursday. Cheers!