Ah, the glorious '80s and '90s—an era when life was as simple as dial-up internet and VHS tapes that chewed up your favorite movies. Back then, we didn't have TikTok or Instagram influencers, we had something way better: our over-caffeinated selves. We were the generation that defined awkwardness, fashioned a wardrobe from questionable neon spandex, and could fit an entire week’s worth of sugary cereal into one bowl before entering a dimension where one could only communicate via Tamagotchis or, if we were feeling extra social, with a game of Pogs.
Remember when your biggest concern was whether or not your mixtape of Air Supply and Madonna would get you the girl? Ah, mixtapes! The original Tinder, except we didn’t have to swipe left if the dude in the cassette of "Like a Virgin" wasn’t our type—thank you, Joe Camel for always being there for me. Who needed a fancy gym membership when we could spend entire afternoons rollerblading around the neighborhood with a Walkman, high on some mega-sugar Russian candy stick, pretending we were trying out for the Olympic figure skating team? Spoiler alert: We weren’t, and ostriches don’t make great team mascots.
Fast-forward to now, and we can’t even make it to the kitchen without consulting Google Maps. Our idea of “crushing it” is getting out of bed before noon. We’ve traded in our slap bracelets for knee braces and our browsing experience now consists of endless scrolling that’s a lot like dodging cars in Frogger. Not to mention the unyielding existential crisis of whether we need our third cup of coffee to survive a day full of “adulting.” Seriously, when did “adulting” become a thing? Last time I checked, I signed up for just enough responsibilities to ensure my sweet love for pizza rolls and soda never went unfulfilled.
So, next time you find yourself attracting a wave of nostalgia, just remember that those gloriously awkward years—filled with our cringey fashion choices and questionable music choices—are behind us. Sure, life comes at you fast, and while we might be packing on the dad jokes and double chin lines faster than our cassette collections can grow dust bunnies, at least we can still laugh when we accidentally catch ourselves trying to explain what a rotary phone was to the kids today. And we’ll do it wearing our favorite oversized flannel because some styles really are timeless...even if our waistlines are not.